What am I putting at risk  running into the arms of almost every decent boy ??!! Even when out of his mouth the words came “I’m not a man of the light”   I need a man of God after His heart I need someone that is a Man of light love and life

what am I doing compromising how do I exit this  deep set turbulent current  trend and threat

how do you tell some one we dont share the same motivation   I feel so selfish butbuti know the motivation of his heart to be together   and I know it is not always hounrable  nither is mine not
but we both respect honesty but compromise too just to be together
I know beaing with him I am compromising so much

I need to breath I need to  remove this habit of him  habits are easily gained butbutnot lost easily  it takes time and disapline
I need to free me from this I am risking alll I amand all I am to become
I have not in reality realized how much time and energy I was diverting to my habit away from my foundation   getting back on schedule is going to be tought and challenging
Lord help me  to submit it to you

you are the only one that can  work in his heart to mke sence of this    I cant give him what he is expecting or that what he is hunting for   it is something I have cherished for to long

My husband is waiting  for me at your feet and I am running around  knowing that this man is not who you have planned and prepeared for me

Father your destination for my life is worth more than this compromising   situation

I love you to much to be failing in my faithfulness to you

replace this heart with  the first love heart

MINI ADVENTURES

FUNNY THINGS OF ADVENTURES  ARE THAT YOU NEVER EXPECT IT

SMALL THINGS IN EVERY DAY THAT HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE..LITTLE STEPS IN FAITHFULNESS WILL CHANGE PERSPECTIVES AND HEARTS

IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER YOUR HEART NEEDS TO STAY OPEN AND WILLING TO ACCEPT AND LOVE WITHOUT JUDGEMENT AND TO KEEP YOUR HEAD ON YOUR SHOULDERS AND NOT TO COMPROMISE WHO YOU ARE FOR THE FEAR OF REJECTION

THERE IS SO MUCH MORE TO LIFE ! ITS NEVER NEEDED TO FEAR

NEVER FEAR FOR LIVING A LIFE FULL OF BEAUTY AND UTTER CHAOS

SOMETHING I HAVE LEARNT IN LIFE IS THAT THE DEEPEST HURT COMES WITH THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BEGINNINGS!

And now sitting here trying to ground my self in it all   , all of the craziness and the beauty of the promise life has to offer

i now realize that i am more scared of actually becoming a success i am scared of actually living up to my expectations, dreams and missions.   i mean what then what next.

for me it is intimidating to  think that someone like me can actually active  their dreams and i know it does not make sense being scared of the future…

but i know as i sit here and as real as this fear of the future is i know God is  already there making it ever more glorious than what i can ever comprehend

i know the next sunrise will be the awakening of my ministry and will hold the possibility of introducing my husband but that is a totally different subject hahaha

this adventure  has created such a great expectation i have for the future based on promises and word that is starting to bloom.  But i know this is the part of the adventure were you see the horizon of possibilities and realize it is closer than you’ll  ever be but it still requires  a great deal of work to get were your going…